Holding a Teenage Party without Loosing Control
How I Held a Successful Teenage Party?
Rule one nothing on face book.
Yes I got the but how am I going to tell my friends.
The old fashion way write invites and/or tell them face to face.
If anything goes on face book then the party is off.
Have a set number of guests.
Keeps the cost in control and party in control.
All parents to contact parent holding party.
So that you can tell them the rules and what they can expect if their son/ daughter breaks them. For me this was that the parent would be rung no matter the hour and expected to collect their child. I made it clear any one whose parent did not contact me could not come to the party.
I found this a very valuable exercise and when I said no sex, no drugs, and no alcohol. All parents where relieved. What did surprise me was that only one parent actually asked me if there would be alcohol and what ages would be present.
Can the girls/boys sleep over as well?
Sure as long as each girls/boys parents speaks to me first.
I then explained sleeping arrangements in this situation I could keep boys out but not girls in. I then left it up to the girls parents to decide if they trusted their daughters. I trusted my son and friends.
Why do this? It shares the burden and responsibility for all parents. I was making it clear what responsibility I was taking. This worked well. Some parents decided it best if their daughters went home and I respect them for making that call. To be honest I was surprised how many parents allowed their daughters to sleep over.
Don’t go it alone
I am a single parent I did not relish the thought of doing this alone. Even if you are both available Mum and Dad, help from other parents is always handy.
I asked help from the parents of kids invited to stay. Just make sure the parents helping are aware of the rules. If they disagree with your rules then find someone else.
One friend offered her husband and his mate to help. I was very relieved and this worked really well.
We where around but did not hover over the kids .I used bringing food (legitimate excuse) out as a reason to check in on the kids without cramping their style. The men present cooked the BBQ close by; interestingly many of the boys went out of their way to chat with these men. It seems it was an opportunity for these young teenagers/ men to socialise with some older respected men of the community.
Choose your help well
Don’t have parents there who are going to get drunk or use drugs and get stoned. This is embarrassing for your kids if it is you, and embarrassing for the kids at the party if it is their parent.
This is a time for you to be a parent not one of your kid’s friends. Save that behaviour for your own parties with your own friends, preferable when the kids are not around. It just embarrasses them when their parents loose control.
Make it Special.
To make this a special occasion we did something we had never done before, for us this was paintballing.
Boys only,or girls only
The main reason for boys only was to keep the cost down, followed by a party in the evening with the girls. This worked well and made it something special, something most of the boys had never done before.
Other ideas for something special might be hire a jute box or surround sound or a band. I am sure you can think of many special things to do. Of course ask the teenager whose party it is you may be surprised at what it is they actually would like to do.
These things make it something special and also provide recognition on your part that your childteenager is growing up. You do not I repeat you do not need to include alcohol or drugs for it to be a special time.
Did the kids have fun?
Oh yeah they where all asking when the next party would be and what would we do the next year.
Another way I have reduced the anxiety over parties is that each of my children has had a party every second birthday until 13yrs. The next Birthday is 16yrs and the next one will be 21yrs. You decide what suits you and your family don’t feel any pressure to have to give your teenager or any age child a birthday party every year.
With three children 2 yrs apart this means one teenage party every 2 yrs more than enough for us.
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